“FORCE-D” RUN

I am NOT letting the wookie win. Arm sockets be damned.

I am NOT letting the wookie win. Arm sockets be damned.

Hi Trippers!

Exciting news emanating from Tatooine, Kamino, Hoth and Alderaan (wait, it’s not there anymore… forget Alderaan).

The Jedi Council has spoken (in the guise of RunDisney).

The Star Wars Half Marathon Weekend in Disneyland (January 15-18, 2015) was announced yesterday by none other than the Dark Lord of the Sith himself, Darth Vader.

Click on Vader for the announcement.

Click on Vader for the announcement.

So, when I told my buddy Kevin about the race he asked if I was going to run it.

I explained how Disney races are way overpriced and I’ve already begrudgingly ponied up for two Disney races this year (Disneyland and Avengers Half). It’s going to be at least $195 for the half marathon. That’s a boatload (or should I say starship load) of republic credits.

It’s also scheduled for mid January, adding another race to an already busy month. Plus, it’ll be beyond crowded on the course (worse than the Coruscant expressway at rush hour). And given the number of people in costumes (some good, some poor) it’ll be like running through the cantina at Mos Eisley Spaceport (and we all know what wretched hive of scum and villainy that is).

You're a long way from Endor boys.

You’re a long way from Endor boys.

Again he asked me: “So, are you going to run it?”

“Is Mace Windu’s lightsaber purple? Hell yes!”

I am after all a complete and utter Star Wars fanatic.

I spent a good portion of my childhood immersed in the goings on in a galaxy far far away. I owned just about every action figure that Kenner put out. I even had Star Wars sheets on my bed (not anymore… at least as far as you know).

My mom took a day off of work and I skipped school so she could take me to see Return of the Jedi on opening day (she rocks). BTW, I still have the movie program (cover stained with popcorn grease).

I paid to see The Phantom Menace in theaters four times in the hopes that it would get better upon follow-up viewings (sadly, it didn’t).

The very idea of combining my childhood passion with one of my adult passions has me so excited I could indeed pull the ears off of a gundark (up yours space-PETA).

Light 'em up!

Light ’em up!

I will be pounding the pavement in and around Disney clad in some sort of Star Wars garb… be it Jedi robes, an X-Wing fighter flight suit or even dressed as some cantina character. FYI, heaven help anyone dressed as Jar Jar Binks during the run.

And I will be carrying a lightsaber in case I need to shoo a wampa or lop off the arm of some poor sith sympathizer (there was lots of arm/hand chopping in the Star Wars saga, wasn’t there).

Think of it as my own personal “Kessel run” and I will indeed do it in less than 12 parsecs (yes, I know a parsec is a measure of distance, not time).

Fortunately I can guarantee you lots more Star Wars puns in the days/weeks/months leading up to the race.

May the force… umm, you know the rest.

Han shot first and… Run on!

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Posted on May 28, 2014, in General, Humor and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. Wookie costume. Please? For science. For posterity. For blackmail in the nursing home. Please? 😉

    • Yeah, if I wanted to be a wookie I’d just run with my shirt off. I have some ideas (lots of characters to choose from).

      • You’re too tall to be an Ewok. Running dressed like C3PO would be torturous. R2D2 would let you roll your way through the miles. But if you decide on Princess Leia, you MUST do the hair AND the gold bikini. 🙂

  2. Star Wars themed run?! That’s awesome!

  3. I’ve got the high end Vader suit, but that quilted vinyl would be a sweat box!

    • Wow, that would be cool and horrible at the same time. I’ve already started looking for something that will be lightweight, yet Star Wars-y. Although I think the Leia slave bikini would chafe something fierce.

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